Best Methods to Ask a Man Out Chapter 2

If you work at a large company and your prospective date is someone that you don't know very well, try and find out if he is single or not. At the very least, look for a wedding band. At first you might try to share an elevator when he goes in. You could also try to guess where he goes for lunch and eat there too. If you know what time he starts or leaves work, you can try to be in the front lobby when he is there. On these random occasions, flirt with him a little bit. Try giving him a coy smile and look away, or say good morning to him, the point is that you are trying to get him to notice you.

Once this has happened a few times, and he smiles at you or gives you some indication that he is at least acknowledging your existence in a positive way, you could strike up a conversation. Talk about the company, your lunch, the weather, whatever seems suitable to the occasion. Then after working up to it for a while, say something like " I was wondering if you would like to join me for a drink after work some time." Or "I've seen you eating at restaurant "x" … is it any good?" Wait for a positive response and say "Great, I was thinking of trying it out - hey, do you want to come along?" If the response is negative, have an alternative restaurant that you can ask him to. Say "Oh, that's too bad - you know, I go to restaurant "y" sometimes - it's quite good - want to come?" You should make sure that neither of you have any co-workers around when you ask him as this could potentially create problems down the road for both of you. If he accepts, then great! If he declines, he may be involved in a relationship or something, so don't sweat it. Continue to say hello if you see him, but don't go out of your way to have a conversation with him unless he initiates it.

If your love interest is a business associate from a different company, or a professional that you have met at some meeting or course, you have to handle things a little differently. At a time when it is appropriate, make sure that it is not after you have just closed a business deal with him or something, you can simply hand over your business card and say "If you would be interested in going out some time, here is my number." That's it. The ball is in his court, you haven't acted inappropriately and you're not going out on a limb because you haven't made him decide on the spot, nor have you given out your home phone number or disclosed any personal information. With this approach, he cannot be offended in any way. In this situation, it is imperative to make sure that it is not unprofessional to date this person before you take any action.

In the case that your love interest is an acquaintance, whether it is someone on your baseball team, someone in a class of yours, a regular in a bar you may frequent, or a friend of a friend, you have a definite advantage. You already know him a little and you have something in common. At first, have conversations with him when you see him in order that you might discover his interests. Talk about books, movies, sports, bands, museums or anything which seems appropriate to the time or venue. After you know what he likes (providing that you are still interested), you can say something like "I noticed that the art gallery has a new exhibit starting next week, would you be interested in going?" Or "The Nicks are in town this weekend, do you want to check it out?" Odds are that if he is single he will probably go. This is a low-pressure kind of dates that may turn into a relationship, but can at least turn into a friendship. These situations are ideal because he already feels comfortable talking to you, you are going to something that you both will enjoy, and neither of you will be as nervous as you otherwise might be.

Many men out there would love it if a woman made the first move by asking them out. Even if he tells you that he's married, chances are that he is still going to be flattered that someone is interested in him. It seems that when it comes to dating, men are a lot harder to offend than women, so even if he says no, you shouldn't be embarrassed the next time you see him. If you get a refusal, don't take it personally, there are many reasons he might decline, but few of them have anything to do with you. You will never get yes as an answer unless you make the effort to ask… the love of your life may be just waiting for you.

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