[1, 2]
The Rules for 'Nice Guys'
Chapter 2
2. Don't be available to her all the time. Even if you are free
when she calls make her think that you've a full schedule and that
although you'd certainly like to see her, you've got another commitment
- be vague about it if possible. This will not only make her think
that perhaps you've got someone else on the go (jealousy is very
powerful but must be handled with extreme care!) and that your time
is valuable - which means more when you choose to spend it with
her.
3. Always maintain subtle control. For example, if she says "let's
go to the movies tonight" you reply "That's a great idea!
but let's make it Thursday ok?
I've got some things I need
to finish up around here this evening". While this seems to
acquiesce to her wishes and reaffirms your relationship on one level,
it establishes control - and subtle control seems necessary to maintain
respect in the majority of cases.
4. Have your own life! Don't live vicariously through your girlfriend
or let the relationship define you. Ensure that your day is filled
with activities which you may or may not wish to include her in.
Maintain your existing friendships and family bonds. If you drop
everything and devote all your time and energy to your new girlfriend,
she'll feel trapped and pressured. If you have a busy life which
you choose to include her in, she'll feel lucky and special.
5. Don't bare your soul on the first date! - or the second
or the third for that matter. Leave a little mystery about your
past and feelings in the relationship. These things will come out
when the time is right - which is not right away. If a woman thinks
she knows everything there is to know about you, where is the excitement
of discovery going to come from? I'm not suggesting you be aloof
or particularly evasive, just a little vague. Don't supply extremely
personal information unless you have to. This leaves the woman curious
and a little off balance which helps you maintain subtle control.
6. Don't fall into her jealousy traps. If she casually mentions
that she's going out with a male friend and pauses to gauge your
reaction, don't freak out! Say, "oh, ya
" like you
didn't even hear her and then change the subject to something else.
Don't ask any questions about him or what they're doing. If she
persists in talking about this other guy, chances are she's trying
to get a reaction - don't pay any attention. Be confident.
7. When you do go on a date, make it special. Then, don't call
her for a couple of days. This will leave her both wondering why
you're not calling after such a nice time (control!) and anxiously
anticipating your next encounter. Try some of these great
date ideas.
8. When she does something that irritates you, call her on it.
Don't be a jerk but don't let things slide either. If she thinks
you're a pushover, she'll take advantage and eventually lose respect
for you. Besides, sex is always better after a passionate argument!
Now that you have in your possession the keys to more successful
relationships, let me further state that as time goes by, you should
use these less and less as hopefully she'll realize what a great
catch she's landed without you having to resort to the above.
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